Across the street neighbor feeds the stray cats outside. After he empties the food on their plate, he runs his fingers inside of the can and licks the remaining cat food off his fingers.
I have two immediate neighbors; for the sake of this story my house number is 123 and the two neighbors’ house numbers are 124 and 125.
House 124 houses a lovely couple with two kids. I’ve actually babysat their daughter a couple of times (the youngest kid is eight months old) and we’ve been invited over to their place for dinner. They are basically some of the nicest, most pleasant people I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.
House 125 on the other hand… I’ve lived in the house for fifteen years, and I’ve literally never seen either the husband or the wife. The only hint of anyone living in the house is that it’s well-maintained and occasionally there is a car on the driveway. I truly could not have told you anything about them… until fairly recently.
Last year, 124 wanted to widen their (somewhat narrow) driveway and therefore widened it about two feet to the right, in 125’s direction. This all took place on their own land, by the way; we have fences delineating whose property is whose. This was not a property dispute.
Very shortly after the change was made, they were notified by the town that, since we live in the range where cosmetic renovations (at least to the outside) of the house had to be approved by the council before they could be made, they would have to rip it up. How did the town become aware of it? Someone had “anonymously complained” about it.
House 124 went around the neighborhood asking for signatures verifying that they weren’t troublesome people. Almost everyone signed… except 125. Hmm.
Later, before the hearing to attempt to keep the change due to it… seriously not being a major issue, one of the town council members slipped and revealed to 124 that 125 had been the ones to complain. (No surprise there.)
The hearing, unfortunately, ended up denying the request to keep the extra width to their driveway, so they had to get rid of the extra width only about three weeks after having it installed.
Very shortly after (maybe a week after the incident), 125, after fourteen years of no change to their house, suddenly made the decision to go with a “natural wood fence”. It was very ugly and did not suit their house at all. Their house is white with a grayish blue roof and gray stones. The wood is kind of the color of birch wood with lots of knots in it and would look fantastic next to a warmer-colored house. The fence conveniently made it harder to casually talk over the fence to their next-door neighbor, 124. They also added low hedges to that particular side of the house!
Recently, my family went to see 124 for a family event. After having some fun and watching the kids mess around, I casually asked how everything was going with 125.
My wife and I live in a large apartment complex in Chicago. I am not sure which apartment this guy actually lives in, but I always see him zooming out of the courtyard. We call him Future Man.
Future Man does not speak or walk or try to fit into society in anyway. He is easily 6’7 and weights at least 275 pounds. He wears sunglasses at night and I’ve never seen him actually walk. He rides everywhere on one of those two wheeled hover board thingies and at night straps rope lights to his torso that flash incredibly bright red and green light. Sometimes he also has a little Bluetooth speaker clipped to his backpack that blasts some pretty solid 80s/90s hip hop. He does not slow down. He drives it mostly on the road and does not observe such things as stop signs or stop lights.
We have lived in this apartment complex for 5 years and just two weeks ago he acknowledged me for the first time. He simply gave me a head nod and put his hand into a fist as if to say “you’re okay with me.” He said nothing in actuality but I’m still beaming from the experience. He’s my favorite neighbor, but he is weird.
Growing up we had some really crazy neighbors that lived across the road from us. The parents were real nutters and abusive to their kids. They would regularly lock their children out the front of their house and lock the front gate so they couldn’t leave with nothing but 1glass of water. Now this is outback Australia where temperatures would regularly reach 40-45 degrees the kids would be screaming and crying out the front. Police would get called they’d come. Kids would go back inside then get put back out once they’d left.
The mother would also come out the front of the house when my Mum would be farewelling or greeting people and start yelling “MRS COLLO89 WHY WONT YOU BE MY FRIEND?!??! I KNOW YOU THINK IM CRAZY. PLEASE BE MY FRIEND!”
A few years ago I heard the mother had been committed to a psychiatric hospital, husband remarried and kids have nothing to do with them now.
My next door neighbors keep using our stuff. They’ve been caught with their hose attached to our water, taking our outdoor chairs etc. They also have no problem honking their car horn repeatedly at any time of day or night when someone isn’t getting out of the house fast enough.
I recently had a neighbor show up at the end of my front walk and freak the f*** out at my fiancée because the phone company told her that she owes them almost $300 bucks and that the equipment was at our address.
Barring how insanely irresponsible it was of the phone company to casually give away our address, we proved to her during a tour of our house that we don’t have any equipment from that company. She read the company the riot act and apologized to us. We’re now all friends who mutually hate the phone company.
When I got my dog a few years ago, she would sometimes bark when I wasn’t home. This is all pretty normal for a new puppy. My neighbor at the time disagreed. After about a week or so I came home to find a note taped to my door saying my “dog won’t shut up” and that I that suck, and my dog sucked, and that we should both die. So you know, real neighborly advice.
Another time, I ran into my apartment to grab something and then immediately left. As I was locking the door to my apartment, my neighbor stormed out into the hallway to tell me that I was being too loud and need to stop opening and closing the door so much. I guess using a door twice was too much for him.
I did what anyone would do in this situation. I waited for him to move and fortunately the new guy loved my dog. Just goes to show you that everything turns out okay if you just are patient and don’t escalate a situation.
I’ve read a number of posts here which really had me laughing, so I thought it might be neat to start a post where everyone could relate some funny stories so I’ll have something to read while I am bored at work. I’ll start with this one.
The house next to us was being rented out to a number of chinese guys whom I believed worked in several of the local chinese restaurants. It seemed there must have been at least 8 of them in a small 4-bedroom house. None of them appeared to speak english and none made any attempt to speak/socialize with my family though we were frequently outside. During the winter when it snowed, it seemed that none of them had any gloves or boots so they would wrap their hands and feet with plastic bags to shovel. One would shovel for about ten minutes, then another guy would come out and the first guy would take off the bags and pass them to the second guy who would shovel, and so on until the walk was clear.
I had attempted on several occasions to catch someone’s eye to talk while we were all outside, but it seemed they were making a point of avoiding everyone. Later that spring, one of them got a car–they all had bikes up until that time. These guys smoked a lot and started emptying the car ashtry in the driveway which was right next to our property line. My kids would sometimes pick these up and they would blow in my yard. I tried to speak with one of the guys and ask them to stop, but they continued to avoid us. One day, I called the realtor who had put the house up for rental to see if she could speak to these guys. The next morning, we didn’t see anyone in the house. Apparently, they had all cleared out overnight. It turns out the realtor called the owner who called her lawyer who speakes chinese to speak to these guys and he just left them a message. We later learned that the message the lawyer left was just to call him. I suspect they were here illegally and must have thought that INS was about to raid the house. I am still trying to explain to my kids (ages 7 and 4) what happened to all those guys who just disappeared–they thought the boogeyman came and got them!!
I have a lonely old guy for a neighbor, not normal, about 75 years of age. He brags that he watches us. If I am paining in my house, the next day he will say, I saw you were painting last night. At our wedding he was telling all my guests that he is disappointed that I have blinds now (and keep them closed all the time), and told them that my husband and I “like to kiss a lot”. Keep in mind, we do this inside our house, not so much outside.
He’s always on my property even though we have been very nice but clear in telling him we don’t want people on our property when we aren’t around.
He sprays my basement windows with his hose after it rains because they get dirty (when dirt splashes up on them).
He has tried to get into my house with his old key, which he got from the previous owners, but found that it didn’t work. I was home sick that day, and he did not know it.
When my husband isn’t around, he tells me that he likes loose women, and asks me about the tatoo on my back (which obviously must have showed when I was weeding the yard at some point), and whether I have any more tattoos. How appropriate is that?
An older female neighbor of about 70 y.o. got herself an older man. She kept refering to him as her husband, but he had just appeared out of nowhere. He went to her apartment in the morning and left at night in a taxi. It was I think the 2nd of 3rd night when the man was leaving, and the woman was accompanying him to the taxi. She must have forgotten, but she was wearing a wig of very long, curly blond hair. The thought of the older woman performing a Shakira show for the older man was hilarious.
